Without exception, December is crazy for me.
I do this to myself on purpose. December is a time when everyone wants music, and I want to be one of the ones to share it with them. I make money, make connections, and advance my craft. It’s a good thing.
But for the last two years once Christmas Day rolled around I was beaten down. I dragged myself through morning services despite Crohn’s symptoms, and was anti-social spending time with my boyfriend’s family because my guts hurt and my immune system was raging against me.
December 26 is always a beautiful day, when the gigs are over and I can finally begin celebrating Christmas. I always have at least a week off from work, and this year I spent those days reading, writing and spending time with the man I love.
At times I was stir crazy, but that is bound to happen on any retreat. That’s what these days are: retreat. I recharge and create, and I enjoy what I like to call “respite” rather than “break” because the adjectival form of break is “broken”, and that’s not what I’m going for.
Today my respite ends, and I will return to my blessed routine with the peace in my heart that will allow me to respond in love to the frustrations that come day to day. I will immerse myself again into the world of people, one in which I’m challenged to remember hundreds of names, and we all rely on one another.
Sometimes I feel as if I have hardly entered into my adulthood. I still see my life as primarily in front of me. But I feel as if I’ve reached an important milestone, one that makes life easier when I remember its wisdom: I’ve learned what re-charges me, and I’ve learned what I am recharged for.
What fills your tank? And what are you able to do better when your tank is full?
Fran Rossi Szpylczyn says
Best wishes for a good start to a new year! I can’t imagine how anyone involved in music ministry can move a muscle by December 25. Please know that you, along with others, have been in my prayers!
Margaret Felice says
Thank you Fran! Your prayers are appreciated. Happy New Year and Blessed Epiphany!
Isabella R. Moyer says
Happy New Year Margaret! Here’s to gentle transitions into routine and many more opportunities to share your many gifts with us. I do so enjoy your blog. Wishing you much peace, joy and good health 🙂
Margaret Felice says
Thank you so much, and Happy New Year to you as well!